I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
