I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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