I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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