You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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