Kiss
Puke
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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