So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
