i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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