Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ladies don't puke and tell
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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