Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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