Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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