My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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