I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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