I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
there is glitter all over my balls
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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