Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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