Midget sex pt 2 tonight
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
