with your own penis?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize