I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
