Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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