Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
