Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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