I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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