Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you win again, gameday.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize