Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
