D3 body, D1 cock
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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