My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
