Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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