I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
