you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
