He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.