how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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