Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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