I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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