i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
