brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She told me I should be a condom model.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
