your thong is hanging out like whoa
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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