This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
