I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
no, he came in my armpit
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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