Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Randomize
