Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
