He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
