Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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