The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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