Where did you get a picture of my penis
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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