Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
