i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
