remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
