Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(636): View more from Missouri

I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes

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(972): View more from Texas

It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old

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(909): View more from California

it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines

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(419): View more from Ohio

somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(315): View more from New York

My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.

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(501): View more from Arkansas

gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.

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(+61): View more from Australia

i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs

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(518): View more from New York

I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .

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