office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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