If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
