i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
