respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
