So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
So. Much. Porn.
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